burned -

I loved fire so much that I burned everything in sight - and even things that were out of sight/ out of mind. I became addicted to watching it all burn; the way the crisp crackling of the flames devoured anything it touched -- but what happens when the things I wanted to burn couldn't be reached?

 I soon became attached to the idea of building walls and burning bridges, when maybe it should have been the other way around. I never had any intention of coming back once I crossed the bridges. It got to the point where any bridge that was able to be crossed was burnt down way before somebody could step foot on it. 

This cruel habit engulfed my world in flames, I became stuck in one place, spinning in circles,  stuck between tall walls  and burning bridges. There was never anywhere to tun; no escape, no way out. 

Now when anyone sees me with a lighter, they quickly back away because they see it in my eyes. They can see the fire I hold within.

I burn through a lot of things: school, friends, family, etc. but I have never burned myself.  I am not the one ever standing on the bridge or the falling building. I am stuck in cement, not able to move, only able to shout and cry. My emotions are twisted and knotted, pulling at each other trying to escape -- Maybe I should burn myself, but i am too scared.. too scared to show the world the fire hidden inside.

- e